TAYLOR HALL AIN'T NOTHING TO **** WITH

Wanye
August 22 2012 12:38PM

WHOOOOWEEEE Taylor Hall Ladies and Gentlemen!

Amidst a tense labour dispute between the NHLPA and NHL Brass, good news broke today when it was announced that Taylor Hall had signed a seven year contract extension for 42 million dollars with the Mighty Edmonton Oilers.

According to the Oilers website: "GM Steve Tambellini announces the Oilers have agreed to terms with forward Taylor Hall on a new seven-year contract extension with an average annual value (AAV) of $6 million."

Tencer tweeted that Hall commented on his show immediately afterward "I never in my wildest dreams thought I would sign a contract for that amount." That tells you something about the magnitude of the commitment the Oilers just made.

Indeed it is a contract so large that Shawn Horcoff himself was roused by his afternoon butler from his daily nap in a bathtub full of cash to be given the news.

Ryan Whitney got so excited he mistakenly tweeted: "Congrats @hallsy04! 42 mill sheets huh? Im assuming you won't snap on me if I sneak some cactus club giftcards into a meal you pay for again"  42 million sheets is 42 billion dollars in rich guy speak, but that tells you something about the magnitude of the commitment the Oilers just made.

At least we are 99.9% sure that a sheet is a million dollars. We googled it but that was completely unhelpful.

MEMORY LANE

Remember the days when the Oilers couldn't have imagined signing a contract this big in their wildest dreams either? Remember cheering for your favourite Oiler with the knot of fear in the pit of your stomach that if he really killed it he was 99% headed to a larger market?

Right now somewhere Jordan Eberle is sitting on a bejeweled throne, calmly strumming his fingers on a desk made of SOLID GOLD.

God Bless Daryl Katz's infinite pockets and God Bless Taylor Hall.

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